Empty Nest and Full Belly!

So I bought an air-fryer and began posting the stupid shit I do with it on Facebook.  I'm told I should write a blog.  I have a blog, so...consider this your invitation to the wedding 😂 A Three way marriage between the air-fryer,  Facebook and my desire/need to write again! I am nothing if not open-minded...

Please feel free to look into my past posts while you are here.  I used this space for years to write poetry, write posts based on prompts from writing groups and to just get some stuff out of my system.  I will go back and delete anything really dated or irrelevant, but some of this is my best writing. 

I have a few suggestions if you'd like to read a couple of things...

Where I'm From 

Dad

If this is a mid-life crisis, where is my red Corvette?   This one was actually published on the  More magazine website.  To bad it doesn't exist any more! 

I will post the air-fryer stuff to save my Facebook friends**Tee-Hee**but I think I will write the other stuff again, too. 

I have missed it

The power of words

Well, I gonna try again! I could lie and tell you I have been busy or nothing good happened or I had nothing to say, but the truth is I let someone I barely know take the wind out of my "writing sails". A person I had a brief moment with simply said that my writing had changed since I started using some of the prompt sites to jump start my writing. I was horrified! I took that to mean in a bad way and just stopped!!! I never bothered to ask if it was good, bad or indifferent~my totally lack of confidence in my ability took that as a total rejection and I crawled under a rock and licked my wounds (can I manage one more cliche) then I decided to put on my big girl panties (YES I can!!) and go back to it. I will never know what he meant, but I know I have to write so I am going to give it another shot. Some stuff will be real life, some observations, some fiction, but all of it will be me~and that's all I can do.

Wallowing In It & Digging Out of It

I spent today wallowing . I didn't get dressed, I ate crap~and lots of it~all day. My mom came by and all I could think was "I wish she would just go away". I actually set out like an alcoholic to eat myself into a stupor last night. I went to the store, picked out what I wanted and methodically set out to eat. Why? Things have been going so well so long that I guess there had to be downside. This is the downside. A wasted, useless, calorie filled day~I sort of saw it coming. I have been feeling the vague discontent coming on for a while. Looking at real estate websites, checking for jobs on Monster, surfing dating sites, the hard bitch sneaking back out. But none of it means anything. I cannot leave here yet, I love my job, I am trying not to be a rag~what's going on? I guess what my grandma used to say is true~people do change just before your birthday. Mine is a month away and perhaps my self reflection is bubbling to the surface. Maybe the fact that I ate my way through a small African nation's food supply and I actually feel bad about it is a good sign. The fact that I recognize a wasted day is a positive step. And best of all, I have this place to write it down. A friend called to ask me to go out, and of course, I said no. She said she could tell I was not going to go out when she asked earlier in the day and wanted to know what was wrong. I told her I am wallowing and she asked why. When I couldn't tell her, she asked if I had written . That's when it dawned on me~I hadn't and not for several days. I need to write now. The idea that I can get it all out~and not for $125 for a 45 minute hour~ may be the thing that saves me from myself. So I am going to write more~mix a little fiction into my observational stuff, a little humor into my self reflection. With the help of my words, maybe next time I won't sink as low and the trip back to the surface will be shorter...

Falling in Love

Writing is like falling in love. Not the "I now pronounce you husband and wife" kind, but the "OMG~he is so hot, do you he likes me? Will he ask me to the dance? Will he even notice me?" crush kind. When I first started this blog, I just thought it would be kinda fun to say "oh I have a blog". Now it is pretty much on my mind all the time! I am distracted by it~everything is blog material! I am underlining passages in books I am reading-collecting quotes-writing down the stuff my kids/friends/family say that might remotely turn into something I can write down here. I have little pieces of paper everywhere. I am distracted watching movies and TV. Like an obsession. I have even begun to feel like this might be something I could do for real~like maybe write a column or a book of "observations"....

The teenage crush part? Does this sound familiar? "OK, so Drifting is sooooohot! Have you seen him in his baseball uniform? I could just die! I walk by his locker like a million times a day. Do you think he notices? I would just die if he even smiled at me! I have that picture my friend on the yearbook staff gave me and I kiss it every night~kinda weird, huh? But I DON'T CARE! he's so cute! So what if I am failing Chemistry. Who could concentrate with Mr. Tight White Baseball pants sitting in front of me during lab? If we ever do go out, I would let him french me on the first date~I swear I would! And I wouldn't care what anyone says! Look~I wrote his name in my notebook. Drifting Divergence. Mrs. Drifting Divergence , Mr and Mrs Drifting Divergence. Don't you love the sound of it?

See? The parallels are uncanny! The thrill is in the unrequitedness of it all, tho. Like a crush, will the thrill be gone when I make it a real part of my life? Will D.D. become just another spitting, scratching boy jock like long line of others I have always been so attracted to~only to find fault and lose interest in once the crush is public? Do I let it get to second base?~Do I write some of these things in a fleshier form and submit them for publication? Do I risk rejection from that which I am convinced I cannot live without? Do I become Mrs. Drifting Divergence????