I was in church, singing and lifting my hand and worshiping when the thought popped in my head that I am such a Sunday Christian. I love church. I am born again, I believe most of the Bible, have issues with several points of theology v science, but over all I am there as a believer. I still cuss, love rock and roll, don't believe in street/TV evangelism, think gay people really don't have a choice in it, think abortion is between a person and herself. If asked, I tell what I believe, but never offer. I believe religion and spirituality are between you and God. You can hear Him if you listen.
Having said all that, after the singing, and before his real message, Pastor P says (and I paraphrase and infer here) " There is a difference between calling Jesus your Savior and calling him Lord. Savior says "Thanks for the forgiveness, I am going to go live my life now and see ya in Heaven". Lord says "Help me live my life the right way. Guide me everyday and be Lord of my life. You have to seek Me to find Me." Man, I really hate when He does that. It's like a special, silent bolt of lightening meant only for you. And Pastor P is an excellent conductor.
Pastor P also said today that you can have faith for the negative things as well as the positive. You can believe in fear and doubt as well as love and hope. He is right. I think I am going to stop having faith that bad things will happen, that I will always be alone, that I will never have enough money to pay my bills or get my kids through college and I will end up a bag lady when I am old. I am going to have faith in the good things. Love will always be and will come back when I really need it most whether it is a relationship, family, friends or my kids. My kids will go to college and have good lives and even if I have to rent a room at Claire's house, I will spend my later years with health, happiness and dignity. Thanks God~and Pastor P.
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